meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
