): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
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