you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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