Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
