It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
