Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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