sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Randomize