I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
