Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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