She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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