i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
