I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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