There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
