I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
