I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Randomize
