It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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