did you get engaged???
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize
