his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
