My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
