Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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