I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize
