my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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