If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize