he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
