you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
