guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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