I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
