Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
