ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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