I will die if light touches me.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
