Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
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