ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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