You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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