i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
