so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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