Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
