how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
