Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
dude. I can hear the air.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
