VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
