Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
