Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
