i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
