that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
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