Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
