I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Randomize