I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
