Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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