Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
