i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
