nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
