3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Randomize
