I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Randomize
