"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Randomize
