So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
